Thursday, October 22, 2009

Coping With Breast Cancer - Ten Survival Tips

In Chinese, a crisis is expressed in two characters: danger and hidden opportunity. As a breast-cancer survivor, I have faced many challenges, but God has revealed to me opportunities that translate into incredible blessings. I share some suggestions below for those struggling with this disease.

1. Ponder scriptures

Let biblical passages like Psalm 119:105 (likening the Word of God to a lamp) illuminate pathways for healing and reveal any encroaching thorny thickets. Use verses as your penlight to avoid stumbling around in the darkness.

When I joined the ranks of breast-cancer survivors, I clung to Psalm 23 for solace. During chemotherapy I reflected on how God was comforting me as I walked through my own valley of the shadow. Review the list of common emotions in the front or back of your Bible to locate verses that speak to particular sentiments, such as worry, weariness, or fear. Gideon Bibles found in many hotels contain these sections to ease the troubled traveler's mind.

2. Pray unceasingly

One of my childhood treasures was a book entitled "The Lord's Prayer." Each page was inscribed with a verse from Jesus' model prayer in Matt. 6:9-13. Bright illustrations of kneeling children with uplifted hands accompanied each verse. I was captivated by the images. Although as a child I was not yet ready for Jesus' heartrending prayer in the Garden of Gethsemane, this picture book was early preparation for a more mature prayer life.

Prayer is a powerful tool. Like African prayer warriors thriving in the midst of deprivation, during my treatment I lifted prayers to the only One who could take away troubling emotions and side-effects. Lying in bed, I visualized my pallet being lifted to God through the roof in a reverse move from the paralytic brought from the roof to Jesus for healing in Mark 2. I strongly felt God's healing warmth as I prayer-walked upward to meet Him.

3. Treasure fellowship

As a cancer survivor I most assuredly relished the cards, hugs, prayers, and empathy of friends. The blessings of others that dispelled my pouts through bouts of cancer were crucial to healing. Hebrews 10: 24-25 tells us to encourage one another and meet regularly for worship and fellowship. The latter can include simply listening, sharing a meal, or offering a Bible study to encourage camaraderie and spiritual enrichment. My husband and I were blessed by the insights shared at our home Bible study during my cancer treatment.

4. Make church attendance a priority

Ideally, the breast cancer survivor should attend a local church, for reasons extending beyond congregational worship. Shortly after I was diagnosed with cancer, members of a former church we attended rallied around me in prayer for healing. Their love transcended church membership, and coalesced with that of members of our new church. These compassionate individuals provided needed meals and child care as well as spiritual support, something I would have missed had I not attended church.

If your breast cancer has left you home-bound or residing in a facility, you can find other options to connect with a church. Ideas include listening to a radio station offering Bible studies and uplifting choir or praise music, watching a Christian worship service on TV, or enjoying sermons from a visiting pastor.

5. Obtain Biblical counseling

Counseling from a biblical perspective can address many issues with which breast cancer survivors struggle, including guilt, anger, and non-forgiveness. I sought counseling from a local church and a crisis pregnancy center for issues arising from my cancer diagnoses. If these resources are not available, on-line tools are at the disposal of the computer literate. Some people prefer the anonymity of e-mail counseling. Focus on the Family (at (800) A-FAMILY) provides referrals for telephonic counseling sessions.

Financial counseling may be available through a local church, the American Cancer Society, or resources written by Christian financial experts such as Larry Burkett. I learned to organize my bills and health information into labeled file folders, and used my insurance company's website to access histories of appointments and payment records.

6. Recognize life seasons

The time spanning when I was first diagnosed to the end of treatment was only for a season. Recognize with Solomon in Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 the times for every activity under heaven. Of all the seasons listed in this passage, "a time to laugh" appeals to me most. Many studies show that humor helps relieve stress, combat depression, and extend quality of life.

My three sons, ranging in age from 3 to 11 when I was diagnosed, reacted to my cancer by watching how I responded. Comic relief went a long way to dispel the tension they felt. I thoroughly enjoy watching these boys laugh at black-and-white slapstick comedians like Abbott and Costello and at modern-day comedies like "Chicken Run."

"A time to dance" is another fun season. Try some salsa dancing, like a survivor I overheard in the chemotherapy infusion room. It will lift your spirits as well as your feet, control weight, and rev your circulation to the max!

7. Witness using personal testimony

While Christians don't always recover from diseases even though prayed for, they can still use their adversity to glorify God in their lives. Jesus modeled that approach when he delayed coming to Lazarus in Bethany until Lazarus died. The story is found in John 11:3-6. When Jesus heard of Lazarus' sickness, he assured his followers that the outcome would be God-glorifying. Often, the more severe the suffering, the more wondrously God works through the power of personal testimony.

On the Titanic, some Christians gladly relinquished their places on life rafts to the unsaved, witnessing powerfully to their faith in eternal life. We've also heard of Christians in the burning World Trade Center on 9-11-01 witnessing in their last moments to non-believers in the midst of unimaginable terror. 2 Timothy 1:8 admonishes us not to be ashamed to testify about our Lord. It challenges me to go forth boldly, knowing that none can take away my personal story.

My husband's emails on God's mercy throughout my cancer ordeal were sent to all who were curious how I was bearing up. God is faithful in fanning the global fire of the gospel through such testimony.

8. Resolve to understand God

Some disasters shake us to our very core. When I felt myself helplessly mired in the muck of cancer, I recalled Jesus' parable in Matt. 7:24-27. He reassured us that we are set on solid ground, not in sinking sand. As I put our Savior's words into practice, God pulled me up and out of cancer-induced depression and into an indescribable joy. He is the Rock upon which I set my hope.

In the midst of the unexpected, God is there. For example, on September 11, 2001 otherwise annoying delays on their way to work saved some employees' lives. Now, when I am stuck in traffic and an ambulance rushes by on its way to the accident ahead, I bow my head in prayer for the ones affected by such tragedy, rather than wallowing in self-pity over the minor nuisance of a traffic jam. We should consciously determine to understand how God is using such seeming disturbances and thank him for them.

9. Find volunteering opportunities

Almost two millennia ago, Paul taught that all the commandments are summed up in loving your neighbor as yourself (Romans 13:9). Breast-cancer survivors are greatly appreciative of all the sacrifices of others from which they have benefited. Below are some ideas for showing love to fellow cancer strugglers.

If there is no breast-cancer support group in your area, start one. The locale might be your own church for women who are most comfortable in a Christian environment. Or you can volunteer for a local American Cancer Society branch, helping women in myriad ways.

Counseling others in person or by phone or email is another viable possibility. Open any Bible and appropriate passages will jump out to address the situation at hand. Courses on training counselors might be offered at a local church or on-line.

In another vein, you can ask your oncologist if you are eligible to participate in a clinical trial. Not only would you receive state-of-the-art treatment, but you would be personally contributing to advancement of breast cancer research. In this way, the survivor can directly make a difference in moving the whole planet Earth to a "cancer-free zone."

10. Leave behind stereotypes

Stereotyping often leads to judgment. People who appear to have their lives together may not. Jesus taught us in Luke 6:37 not to judge, so that we would not be judged. The breast cancer survivor should not presume that a person who avoids her or doesn't laugh at her jokes cares nothing for her. Some people limited their discussions with me because they didn't trust how they would handle difficult emotions. Certain nurses find it hard to identify with patients' humor because they witness daily so much devastation in the lives of others.

From a different perspective, those dealing with cancer survivors should not assume that such survivors can perform all tasks, regardless of their outward appearance. Because of lymphedema that developed in my arm after lymph-node removal and radiation, I do not lift or carry heavy items. I make others aware of this limitation, since it is not obvious. Conversely, one should not place artificial limits on cancer survivors. For example, during cancer treatments I kept up my regular aerobic exercise. I continued my work as an attorney in a high-intensity environment, although I did revert to a part-time schedule for a season. I painted landscapes. While this amazed some people, it is not uncommon for cancer survivors to adhere to old routines for a semblance of normalcy. The bottom line is to endeavor to delve into what makes a person tick before reaching conclusions.

These are some ways I found to fend off the breast-cancer blues. I pray that those facing the crisis of breast cancer will find hidden opportunities and blessings, and hear the Savior say at the pearly gates of heaven, "Well done, good and faithful servant!"

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